Welcome to Night Vale - population: you and me.
found this gem in the 1996 Cornell Women’s Handbook. it’s what to say when a guy tries to get out of using a condom
I GIVE YOU A HAMBURGER
f UCK PLEASE NOT AGAIN
NOT THIS AGAIN
I HAVE SURVIVED LIKE 2 YEARS WITHOUT THIS DEEP HAMBURGER LEVEL SHIT
Oh god. It’s finally back.
YESSSS FINALLY IT CAME BACK
If you have freckles on Alternia then you are considered a badass and a rebel because one can only get freckles from being out in the blinding sun.
Kanaya is the biggest badass
Someone who hasn’t read Homestuck, please explain this
distressed blue nerd has a magic pencil and tries to draw himself a swaggie boyfriend, but the swaggie boyfriend starts to multiply and before boy blue knows what is happening he is drowning in a sea of crudely drawn swag bfs
100% tru fax
While on the ship on the yellow yard through the fourth wall, John accidentally pricked his finger on a spinning wheel and fell into a death-like sleep. Only after a week did Davesprite attempt to wake him with a kiss. John immediately woke up a threw a pie in his face, raising his prankster’s gambit to over 9000.
Homestucks are dangerous gangs forming all around the world. They travel in groups of multiples of 12 and are typically seen around conventions wearing grey paint and horns; often mistaken for satanists. If seen in public, DO NOT APPROACH. THEY ARE DANGEROUS. THEY WILL MAKE YOU ONE OF THEM. LEAVE THE PREMISES IMMEDIATELY AND INFORM YOUR LOCAL AUTHORITY.
so then explain jason biggs, chapman. EXPLAIN JASON BIGGS.
A while ago I heard a version of this story where Athena has pity on Medusa and turns her into the gorgon to protect her from all men. A gift instead of a punishment for her brother’s crimes.
It always stuck with me, so here’s a doodle.
This has come up on my blog a few times, and I REALLY really am struck by how beautiful this is. so.. reblogging it to you guys. Isn’t it lovely?
"if you don’t consider breasts sexual organs then why do you care if i grab them"
well EXCUSE ME BUT IF I JUST STRUTTED UP AND GRABBED YOUR EAR AND FELT IT UP LIKE MMMM YEAH BABY I BET YOU HEAR REAAAL GOOD WOULD YOU NOT BE UNCOMFORTABLE
glad to see y’all spreading the word
So I work at Target, and I had to help this woman carry 20 large bags of cat food into her car. When I asked her how many cats she had, she responded with:
"The first 25 have names, and the rest just come and go."
And then she proceeded to tell me:
"You are such a nice young man. You would make a good cat."
Cat ladies are fucking awesome
What if she’s a witch and takes you and turns you into a cat and she’s been trying to find more people to turn into cats and that’s why she has so many?
write a book
20 Pet Owners Who Are Doing it Right
I showed this picture to my mom and she explained me this. “Kids today don’t watch cartoons as much, when you were little you were addicted to cartoons. Nowadays there are so many social media sites and games that kids aren’t interested in cartoons anymore. Even at your age ( I’m 17) you still watch and enjoy watching cartoons because that’s how you grew up. While your sisters aren’t that interested in them because they have their electronic devices. That’s why cartoon network went from having a variety of cartoons to watch daily, to a select few that are now aired.”
this makes me so sad
(Source: lepipehd, via imsorryforthenightsicantremember)